I read the Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin and I’ve decided to create my own Happiness Project this year just to give me a constant nudge to think about what makes me happy and a reminder to keep doing those things.
Project begins by identifying personal commandments that you use or want to adopt for your life that encourage your own kind of happiness. Here are mine:
- Be the kind of woman I want my daughters to be
- Go Outside
- Forget the Past
- Let go, Let God
- Stay In Touch
- Fail often
- I am always more than enough
- Be silly, be playful
- First, mother yourself
- Be a haven, a sanctuary
- Be a treasure house of good memories
- Smile to yourself
- What other people think of me is none of my business
- There are no wrong choices
- All the heavy things, just let them go
- I am not a victim, I am a Creator of my beautiful life.
I like to look at these commandments at the beginning of the day or when I am feeling sad or stressed out.
Next step: Identify 12 areas from your life where you want to be more happy and fulfilled.
What are your personal commandments?
Well, I am going to try it.
I was baptized Catholic but never did my first communion. I went to Catholic Church on some Saturdays as a child but I was never into it. In fact, I dreaded it. I mostly remember my mom pinching me for giggling or for catching my sister and I playing thumb war. I went to a Catholic university but not because it was Catholic. I had my first positive Church experience there and I had professors who were priests and nuns and they were fantastic teachers who were able to have rational and warm conversations about God and spirituality. I really enjoyed it and it felt so different from the dark and gloomy Catholicism I experienced as a child. After college, I stopped going to mass.
This past year has been a tough year for me. It has also been a tough year for my relationship with my boyfriend. I did not think about going back to Church until one of my sisters recommended it to me as I told her about my S.O. problems. I have never thought of Church as a source of relief or help.
Now that I am slowly coming out of a dark period in my life, I am trying to look ahead and plan for a new year full of self care activities. This list may include therapy, regular exercise routine, more friend dates and Church. I do not what I am looking to get out of this or if it will bring me any happiness at all but I am going to get out of my comfort zone and visit different services at different churches until I find one that speaks to me. And it is okay if I do not find something. But for my own sake, I need something new and different.
Wish me luck.
Dark memories and worries about the future woke me up this morning. Not cool. I know this happens to everybody and it sucks. It’s been happening to me more often the last few weeks. This is often a sign that I am not taking care of myself as best as I should. I am not taking care of my emotional health. I have a million excuses not to take care of my emotional health. Work has been busy and we’re still organizing our new place and trying to prepare for upcoming family events. Yes, I have tons of stuff going and I’m sure you do too. But taking care of ourselves is most important. Self preservation is so important. When the dark memories and worries start to come after me, it’s because I am not dealing with something or I am not expressing something that is bothering me. Just voicing my concerns about the future of things that may never happen can make me feel a lot better. My acts of self-preservation lies mostly in writing and affirmations. Getting up early and writing about what is on my mind and what I am feeling has served as a great release for me. The problem is that I do not do it every day and sometimes only once or twice a week. I need to take a step back and make my writing a priority in my day-to-day. My writing is not a luxury but a necessity to my peace and happiness.
Writing is my act of self-preservation.